Drunken Mistake
by jasmineflower112
Summary: Dean drunkenly kisses Cas, and it changes everything between them. Initially, Dean wants to forget that it ever happened, but is hypocritically pissed off when Cas seems to want the same. What will it take to get these two to admit their feelings for one another? Canon setting, Destiel with a side of Saileen. M/M slash, slash scenes.
1. One Little Kiss

**Ch 1 One Little Kiss**

 **Disclaimer** : I own nothing but the plot.

 **Warnings** : slash. Hot male on male sex. If you don't like it, don't read. Violence, language, etc.

* * *

Dean spent a lot of time drinking.

Tonight was another night spent alone at the bar; he invited his brother to come with, but the little turd preferred to stay home and "research". He sometimes wondered if "research" meant porn or something, because he had no idea how Sam can spend hours upon hours of just digging through the archives. What a nerd. Dean was spending days upon days cooped up in the bunker; so he decided to go out and maybe get laid. He spent more time at the bar then he planned to, and ended up stumbling home around two in the morning. It wasn't the first nor would it be the last time he'd driven drunk.

"Fuck, damn," he grumbled incoherently as he dropped his keys for the umpteenth time. He somehow managed to bend over and retrieve them without completely falling over. Hiccupping lightly, he let himself into the bunker.

"Honey, I'm home!" he called jubilantly, chuckling to himself as he steadied himself against the stair railing.

"Dean?" Cas appeared in front of him; scaring Dean out his skin.

"Shit, Cas!" Dean hissed, before dissolving into giggles. Castiel stared at him, dumbfounded, "I'm going to make you wear a bell," he slurred.

"Dean, did you have too much to drink?"

He hiccupped, "Maybe."

"Okay, I'm taking you to bed now."

Dean felt Cas' hand wrap around his forearm; before he found himself standing in his room. The desk lamp was on, and the room was surprisingly neat. Dean found himself being carefully shoved unto his bed, a laugh bubbling past his lips upon impact, "Not even gonna buy me a drink first?"

"You're already drunk, Dean," Cas admonished, making quick work of removing Dean's shoes.

"Damn right I am," when Cas backed off for a moment, Dean took the opportunity to stumble to his feet yet again. Cas caught him around the waist, steadying him against his chest. The drunk hunter pulled back slightly; noticing the rising heat to the angel's face; could angels seriously blush?

"Flustered looks cute on ya."

"Dean, you're acting strange," Cas says in what was supposed to be a controlled tone, but it came out like a squeak instead, "It's the alcohol—"

"Don't need alcohol to think you're cute, Cas," Dean cooed, leaning too close for comfort and nuzzling at his neck, "Always thought so."

"Y—You don't mean that, you're drunk," Cas informs him yet again; calmly trying to remove Dean from against his chest. The stocky male had a firm grip on him, his arms thrown around his torso and neck, keeping him in place. Cas didn't want to hurt Dean by physically forcing him off. Maybe he could reason with him, "You won't even remember this by morning."

"Maybe I won't," Dean slurred, pulling back so he could look into Cas' baby blue eyes, "But that just gives me more of a reason to do this."

He leaned forward, and pressed his lips fully against his. Cas' eyes widened in shock, his jaw going slack as Dean pressed him against the wall. Dean's breath tasted like whiskey, and Cas was sure he could lose himself in it. His eyes slide closed, one arm circling Dean's waist and the other snaking around his neck to pull him closer. Mouths press messily against each other, teeth clacking, tongues intertwining. It was a sloppy excuse for a first kiss, and it made Cas' head fuzzy. Dean's lips were warm and plush, just as he'd imagined them to be…

When air became a necessity—for Dean, at least—they broke apart. Dean was panting harshly, their foreheads pressed against each other as a blue gaze locked with green.

"D—Dean, we can't—" Cas whispered, his voice rough and hoarse, "You'll regret it."

"I won't regret anything with you," he growled, and he sounded so sure of himself, Cas almost gave in.

Almost.

"You will," the conviction in Cas' voice was for his own sake, so he removed himself from Dean's grasp and gave him a firm push. Dean backed off; even drunk, he wouldn't force anyone, especially Cas, to sleep with him. No matter how much he longed for it; something he couldn't accept to see in himself when he wasn't inebriated.

"Fuck," he groaned, and laid down. He pulled the comforter over himself, and in seconds, he was out cold.

Castiel couldn't help but smile fondly at the now passed out Dean—the man truly took the drinking too far tonight. It was hard to get Dean Winchester drunk, but not impossible. He touched his lips, still able to feel the ghost of Dean's mouth pressed them. He would forget about this night; he wouldn't delude himself into thinking it was anything else but a drunken mistake.

Turning the lights off, he left Dean to sleep it off.

* * *

Dean woke up the next morning with a pounding headache. He groaned and tossed the covers off his sweaty body; the events of last night catching up to him in a steady blur. Another, longer groan escapes his lips and he rubs his temples and forehead in anger; at himself. He… kissed his best friend last night. He… Actually made a move on Cas and wasn't promptly rejected. He blearily remembered kissing the angel, but he couldn't remember if Cas liked it or not.

' _This is ridiculous, who cares if he liked it?! Cas is my best friend and a_ _ **dude**_ _for chuck's sake!'_

Okay, he needed to calm down. Maybe if he pretended like it never happened; Cas wouldn't bring it up. It was a mistake, one that never needed to be repeated. Dean was straight, damn it! Besides, he was not in the headspace for anything like a relationship right now…

Seriously, why was he even thinking about this? He climbed out of bed and headed for the bathroom; planning to stay in the shower until he could forget about what happened last night.

Once out the steaming shower, he redressed himself and went downstairs to see Sam seated at the dining room table, a paper bag resting on the table near him as he chowed down on a salad. What a prissy. His little brother looks up and gestures to the bag, "I heard you stumbled in late last night. Have fun last night?"

"Fun night, crappy morning," Dean grunted in response, slumping into the chair next to his brother and opening up the bag. He found a nice, greasy burger and some fries, and he groaned in appreciation, "You're the best, Sammy."

"Wanna be left alone with that burger, Dean?"

"Maybe."

Sam chuckled and shook his head at his brother, "Well, while you were sleeping it off, I found us a case."

"All work and no play, huh?" he smirked through his mouthful of burger.

"Well, we've been holed up at the bunker for a few days now, figured it was time," Sam replied, squinting a bit at him, "Are you okay?"

Dean stiffened a bit, but tried his best to play it cool by taking another bite of his burger, "Fine, why do you ask?"

"Cas was worried about you," Sam's tone was casual, but Dean could sense a prodding question anywhere.

"I'm fine, you know Cas; he worries too much," he grumbled in response, chowing down a mouthful of fries.

Sam made a face at how Dean was carelessly stuffing his mouth; his brother can be so disgusting at times, "Yeah, but you tend to worry too little when it comes to your well-being."

"Don't start, Samantha," Dean groaned in response, and Sam finally let it drop.

Cas chose to enter the kitchen at that time; his eyes instantly locking with Dean's. Dean swore he felt his heart skip a beat, but he would deny that to the day of his death. Cas was the first one to look away, his blue gaze drifting to the floor then back up to Dean, "Glad to see you're awake and coherent."

Dean chuckled in response, however it sounded a bit strained, "Yeah, uh… Thanks, for last night. Helping me get to bed, and all."

"No problem," Cas smiled politely back, before redirecting his gaze to Sam, "I'll be in the library, if you need me."

He retreated from the room and disappeared into the hallway. Dean watched him go; a sinking feeling in his chest. That was a lot less awkward then it should've been; why was Cas pretending like what happened last night didn't happen? More importantly, why the hell did Dean care about that?

He rubbed his temples; how did things get so complicated so fast? One little kiss, a kiss that never should've happened, and now he was acting like a school girl with a crush. He growled in disgust at himself, pushing himself away from the table and standing up, "I'm gonna go back to my room."

"Dean?"

His brother was already walking away; leaving Sam to wonder what the hell just happened.

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 **a/n** : review, let me know what you think!


	2. Lust or Love?

**Ch. 2 Lust or Love?**

 **-00- = POV change  
** **line break = change of scene**

* * *

Cas could feel a pair of eyes burning into the back of his skull; he didn't even have to turn his head to know that it was Dean. Glaring at him from a few tables away. He and Sam were discussing a hunt when he apparently decided to stop listening and instead stare at the angel. Dean's been acting weird since that night he's stumbled home and kissed him; he's been avoiding him at all costs, but constant with the staring. Anytime Cas would attempt to return the stare, he would quickly look away and preoccupy himself with something else. Cas noted the way the tips of his ears subtly turn red when he was embarrassed.

It was so… enrapturing.

The angel ignored Dean's watchful eyes on him; trying his best to focus on the text in front of him. He busied himself with reading through an old book; he hadn't cared to remember what the name of it was. Anything was better than being stuck in awkward silence with the man he loved.

He knew his affections would never be returned; at least, not when Dean was in his right mind. Dean was straight; he's never shown any outward interest in men. Just females. Trashy females that were no good for him, but still… They had parts Castiel himself didn't. Parts that Dean must enjoy more than the male body.

He sighed out loud; closing the book and pushing it away from him. He would never get over Dean if he continued to think that there was a chance they could be together… The Winchester's friendship was enough.

Cas felt selfish; wanting to horde Dean, never let anyone else taste him, or touch him. He wanted Dean to be his.

Being around him with such strong feelings was hard enough, and the kiss a few nights ago did nothing to help. Every time he closed his eyes, he remembered the moment it happened. The hitch in Dean's breath, the close-up view of those pretty green eyes, how his tongue tasted like whiskey and how weak he felt in the knees when those plush lips pressed against his.

Cas sighed again, _Yup, I'm going to hell._

He stood up from where he sat, and left the room. He needed distance between himself and the hunter; or he might not be able to reign his desires in.

-00-

"—Dean, are you even listening to me?"

"Hm?"

Craning his neck to the side to peer at his brother; he was briefly reminded of Sam's presence there. He had spaced out two seconds into Sam's spiel, and truth be told, he wasn't sorry about that. He told Sam that he wanted him to relax more, but of course Sam just continued talking and talking… A hunt was the last thing on his mind right now; hasn't his younger brother heard of a thing called a break?

He had been too busy gazing at Cas to care about whatever hunt he's dug up this time. The angel had a nice profile; Dean's eyes had been tracing his cheekbones, and his big blue eyes. He's noticed this before, but Cas has the prettiest eyes he's ever seen on anyone. _What a stupid girly thought,_ he scoffed at himself, but that didn't stop him from staring. He sighs softly when Cas suddenly gets up and exits the room without a word. There he goes again; walking out of any room that had to the of them together in it. He was going to corner him sometime, and find out why he was avoiding him.

Not that he cared, of course. That kiss was nothing but a mistake.

He tried not to think about it; it made emotions he hasn't felt in a long time—maybe even never before, spin in his head. He wasn't ready for any of it.

"Dude—can you stare at Cas some other time?" Sam's irritated, bitchy voice was too annoying to ignore so Dean turned in his chair to fully face him.

"Shut up, Bitch," Dean replied testily, grabbing his whiskey and taking a swig from it, "Vampires nest? No problem."

"You're way off," Sam hissed in annoyance, "Possible haunting. You've been like that when Cas is around lately—all quiet but it's obvious your attention is on him. You wanna talk to him but you don't know how, am I right?"

"Sammy—I swear to god—"

"I don't care if you're into guys Dean," Sam interrupted him, his voice not losing a hint of the edge to it, "Work it out with Cas, you two have been avoiding each other and making it awkward as hell for me. And you—you're a total space cadet lately."

"Okay, okay," Dean held up a placating hand to him, "Sorry, alright? I'll—I'll talk to Cas, but not because I'm gay—"

"Of course you're not."

"Tone it down on the sarcasm," the older brother huffed, taking another swig of whiskey, "Don't even suggest I'm into guys."

"Maybe not guys in general—but Cas, yes!" Sam retorted; his eye brows drawn like they usually are when his little brother is irritated, "Something happened between you two, right? That's why you guys are avoiding each other."

"Shut up, Sammy," Dean growled, standing up from the chair, "Let me know if you want to come on that hunt; I'm gonna go pack."

Dean left the room without another word.

* * *

He meant to go to his room and pack; so how did he end up in front of Cas' door? He lets out a sigh; rolling his eyes at himself. He felt like some pining, lovesick teenage girl. Still, he stays put; staring at the door as if it held some answers for him.

There's no way he's into guys, right?

There's no way he wants… _Cas_ like that.

… Right?

"How long are you gonna stand in front of my door, Dean?" Cas' clipped tone could be heard beyond the door. Dean cursed inwardly; damn angels and their alert senses, "You can come in."

Dean sighed and opened the door; letting himself into the room. Cas was standing by his bed; looking slightly concerned as Dean approached him, "is there something wrong?"

"'Something wrong'? That's a trick question, am I right?" Dean scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest. Cas could tell just by that he's closed off right now; hopefully he wouldn't make it worse. All he wanted was for things to go back to normal between them.

"I don't understand what you mean," He admits, avoiding eye contact.

"You know exactly what I mean—we have to talk about what happened a few nights ago."

"Nothing happened," Cas replied calmly, still avoiding Dean's green eyes. He couldn't pretend that it was no big deal if he looked into those emerald depths, "You were inebriated. I helped you."

Dean narrowed his eyes, "I'm talking about what happened between that. I—" he cut himself off, his hand going up to rub at the back of his neck awkwardly, "… Kissed you."

"You did, but you didn't mean to."

"Exactly!" Dean eagerly agreed, seeming to relax somewhat. Cas' heart sank with disappointment; he struggled not to let it show on his expression, "It was a mistake; I just want us to be cool again. You know… Back to normal."

"… Right, well, yeah. Me too," Cas agrees, a fake smile appearing on his lips. He was lying through his teeth, but he knew his feelings towards Dean would never be returned. So why bother pushing it?

"Good," Dean nods his head and smiles back at him; for some reason it didn't look sincere either. Before Cas could comment further, Dean turned and headed for his bedroom door, "Sammy and I have a hunt; hold down the fort while we're gone, yeah?"

"Do you want me to accompany you?"

"I think we'll be fine," He opens the door and looks at him over his shoulder, "You should rest, anyways."

"Call me if you need me."

"Yeah."

Dean left the room. Once Cas heard his footsteps fade away, he let out a longing sigh that he's been holding in. Maybe there was a part of him that thought there was a sliver of a chance that Dean would want to repeat the kiss that happened that night. Maybe even do more.

 _Lord help me,_ he thought bitterly.

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 **a/n: this is hella late but better late then never amirite.**

 **don't forget to review!**


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